How do you know if the person you are talking to is who they say they are?
Q: How do you know if the person you are talking to is who they say they are? I’ve met women who are good at representing themselves one way, and then a month goes by and they’re a complete mess. How do I save myself the month of agony?
A: When you are dating, you likely have an ideal in mind; some might call her “the girl of your dreams.” She’s the one your looking for!
When you meet someone you like, it’s easy to see the qualities you’re looking for and overlook those that don’t fit.
My point here is you need to keep your eyes open! You don’t have to look for red-flags, but whatever you do, don’t ignore them!
It is smartest to proceed in building a friendship, for this is what lasting committed relationships are based on.
Romantic feelings can overwhelm your otherwise responsible mind, however, and you likely overlook the signs of “the mess.”
BOTTOM LINE:
- What I am telling you to do is pay attention! The signs are there all along. Listen to your gut.
- If you really think about it, you can probably look back at each “mess” of a woman and say, “Yeah, I did get a whiff of that, but I ignored it because she was so hot, charming, smart, etc.”




