What can I do if my family has strict rules about who I date?
Q. My family has strict rules about who I can date. I really like Luke, but he’s not from the same traditions as us. What should I do?
A. Strict rules? Your dating life is your business. You’re a grown woman. You’re old enough to decide for yourself who to date. You do need, however, to think through the consequences of falling in love with and/or marrying someone outside of your family’s traditions. This could have huge long term, negative ramifications. Think about whether you’d be willing to compromise your participation in traditional gatherings or whether you’d expect your spouse or boyfriend to participate with you. What if he does not wish to? What about your (future) children? Your family will want all of you to participate with them. Do you want that too? How will that work? There is so much to consider beyond just dating. If you are dating just to have some fun, that’s one thing, but if you are looking for someone to share your life with, you really need to explore the consequences of dating someone of a different “tradition.”
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